Debateatron 2012: Debate Another Day

8:40PM: For crying out loud. God. I’ve never been so happy to see a hot black man leave my TV screen. Jesus. I’m done y’all. Done. DONE.

Do you realize… this horrible GOP candidate is effectively TIED with Obama?! He’s done nothing but lie, and half of the people in this country are ok with that.

Good night, I’m going to go drink and cry.

8:39PM: I’m a victim of this fucking debate y’all. I USED TO BE A HAPPY PERSON. I USED TO LOVE FLOWERS AND KITTENS.

Now I just want to drink and lay on the floor.

8:37PM: *throws self to floor* He’s such a liar. SUCH a liar. When he left Mass., they were 47th in job creation.

http://www.factcheck.org/2012/06/romneys-jobs-record-is-best-or-worst/

8:36PM: ERMAEVERLOVIN’GHERD Y’ALL I CAN’T TAKE THIS BULLSHIT MUCH LONGER.

8:34PM: Bullshit! OMG. Look, if you want Apple to bring manufacturing to the US that means 1) tax cuts for US jobs coming in and 2) iPhones will cost more.

Obama just made a MISTAKE. “Some jobs won’t be coming back.” That’ll be in a commercial, out of context, tomorrow.

8:33PM: Why don’t I do this for a living?! Obama just stole my point!

8:31PM: Sigh. China’s currency has risen by almost a third against the dollar since 2005, helping to raise Chinese labor and manufacturing costs.

Why?

Because the Obama administration has applied diplomatic pressure instead of starting a trade war. Good God. ALL THIS STUFF IS EASY TO FIND, PEOPLE. EASY TO FIND.

8:28PM: Trickle-down government has never worked anywhere BECAUSE IT’S A PHRASE YOU JUST MADE UP.

8:23PM: MARRIAGE CURES GUNS Y’ALL!! And more easily debunked bullshit about Fast and Furious. Go read the wiki, it’s fairly good:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Fast_and_Furious

This part is good:

Under the previous Operation Wide Receiver, there had been a formal ATF contract with the cooperating gun dealer and efforts were made to involve the ATF Mexico City Office (MCO) and Mexican law enforcement. Under Operation Fast and Furious, at Newell’s insistence the cooperating gun dealers did not have contracts with ATF, and MCO and Mexican police were left in the dark.

AND ALSO

While the OIG report found no evidence that higher officials at the Justice Department in Washington had authorized or approved of the tactics used in the Fast and Furious investigations, it did fault 14 lower officials for related failures, including failures to take note of “red flags” uncovered by the investigation, as well as failures to follow up on information produced through Operation Fast and Furious and its predecessor, Operation Wide Receiver. The report also noted ATF agents’ apparent frustrations over legal obstacles from the Phoenix Attorney’s Office to prosecuting suspected “straw-buyers,” while also criticizing the agents’ failure to quickly intervene and interdict weapons obtained by low-level suspects in the case. The 14 Justice Department employees were referred for possible internal discipline. The Justice Department’s Criminal Division head Lanny Breuer, an Obama appointee, was cited for not alerting his bosses in 2010 to the flaws of Operation Wide Receiver.

8:21PM: Obama really just bullshat his way through that. Like such as in The Iraqs and The South Africas.

Romney is (currently) pro-gun. Currently. Sigh.

This gets exhausting after a while….

He’s just pivoted from gun control TO MARRIAGE. Fuck me.

8:19PM: Fact. Obama hasn’t done anything on gun control.

8:15PM: Here’s a transcript babies:

http://foxnewsinsider.com/2012/09/12/transcript-read-president-obamas-remarks-on-american-deaths-in-libya-attack/

Let me draw your attention to this bit here:

No acts of terror will ever shake the resolve of this great nation, alter that character or eclipse the light of the values that we stand for.

8:14PM: Oh, ok. So nobody knew if it was a terrorist attack or what yet? WHY DID YOU CALL A PRESS CONFERENCE *WHILE* THE ATTACK WAS GOING ON???

HOLY SHIT. He’s crapping on Obama for fundraising during the investigation on Libya?! WTF? YOU CALLED A PRESS CONFERENCE TO BAG ON THE PRESIDENT *WHILE* PEOPLE WERE DYING, YOU IDIOT.

8:12PM: Ooookay, that’s a really good question there. Why *did* the embassy deny extra security?

I like that Obama is taking a personal ownership. “I sent them there.” He’s kind of dodging the original question though, must say. The question was… why did the embassy refuse security and who made that call? Oh, and also? I popped Bin Laden. I’ll pop some caps in some Libyan Al Qaeda too.

Yeah. That was such a dumb thing to do… Romney calling the press conference on Libya. It reminds me strongly of when McCain called the press conference on the economy, suspending his campaign. That was the death of it.

8:10PM: I’m having like…. 43% less fun on this debate than the previous 2… mostly because Romney is just such a BAD candidate.

8:05PM: Romney’s debate methodology is a mix of blatant lies and cribbing off policies that ALREADY EXIST.

“Let me just ignore you, Candy, and say what I want to.”

And yeah. Obama DID answer “why he didn’t get immigration reform done in year 1.” Here, let me help you, here’s a link:

whattus the fuckus?!

8:02PM: Fact. Obama has presided over the LARGEST deportation wave ever. He’s deported more undocumented residents  tha

n ANY PRESIDENT since 1892, which is when we started measuring this.

http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2012/aug/10/american-principles-action/has-barack-obama-deported-more-people-any-other-pr/

8PM: Ok. If your dad was born in Mexico of American parents, HE IS NOT AN IMMIGRANT. He was, in fact, the son of a polygamist Mormon who moved to Mexico to escape US laws.

Also. There is already a system to check the citizenship of job seekers.

WAIT WHAT?? ROMNEY NOW SUPPORTS THE DREAM ACT!??!?!

7:58PM: Um. Reagan raised taxes, asshat. HE RAISED TAXES. THAT’S HOW HE GREW THE ECONOMY. HE RAISED TAXES. HE CREATED A MASSIVE DEBT.

http://www.thepragmaticpundit.com/2012/01/reagan-raised-taxes-debt-ceiling.html

7:55PM: I wish Romney would say “Who let the dogs out?! WHO? WHO?” That would be funny.

Who?!

7:54PM: I think Obama just got a little overwrought… but maybe that’s what’s needed from him? Someone needs to light a fire under his shapely ass, just sayin’.

Romney’s standing. Here it comes.

HUSH PRES.

7:52PM: That was an interesting exchange… It’s hard to crack a joke about it, frankly… Hmm.

Michael Jones may not be as optimist as he was in 2008, but he’ll still vote for Obama. It’s in the framing of his question, “Daddy? Tell me I’m pretty?”

Then kisses.

….. Just me?

7:51PM: Surveillance huhwhat?

Oh snap. Obama just pre-debunked a Romney lie. Romney’s been saying that there have been NO TRADE AGREEMENTS under Obama, when in fact there have been 3 of them. The three largest since NAFTA.

Something something, tires, something something. Sorry, I zoned there. Gin. *shrug*

7:49PM: So Romney just gave a long list of shit “he’d like” to see… but NOTHING on how he’d CREATE those conditions. NO INFORMATION. Nothing.

Obama… the monologue on how shitty Bush was is wearing thin, yo… abridge that and get to it.

7:48PM: WTF? I love it. Obama makes birth control AVAILABLE for women. Romney calls that “a bureaucrat forcing women to take birth control?!”

7:45PM: I think I can sum up Obama’s point a little more succinctly… WE CAN’T PARTICIPATE IN THE ECONOMY WHEN BABIES KEEP FALLING OUT OF OUR COOTERS.

Yeah. I think I hit all the high notes.

Barack, can I call you Barack? Barack, don’t interrupt the moderator…

Susan is an undecided voter because, and let’s be blunt here. SHE’S A MORON. How can anyone be undecided at this point?! All the info is OUT THERE.
Also, something like 26 of 34 of Romney’s advisers are Bushies.

7:43PM: Note to self: Gin is not for debates. Gin makes me an angry drunk y’all. I’m just ugh… wanting to toss my monitor out a window.

Good God y’all….

7:41PM: I like that he keeps bringing up the changes to college loans. That’s a bigger deal that has been made of it.

Pay equity for women, Roms. Let me help you, since I know you’re going to LIE:

Liar.

7:40PM: oOOOOooOOoOooOOOOOOOOoooooh. LADY BUSINESS, Y’ALL.

Obama has the record on this one. Let’s seeeeee what R-Money says….

7:37PM: Obama has not doubled the debt, FYI. I mean, if you include the 2009 budget (which was from Bush), he STILL hasn’t doubled it. In fact, under Obama, discretionary spending is the slowest growing in like… 60 years. FACTS!!

ROMNEY IS IGNORING THE MODERATOR AGAIN

7:34PM: I think Obama is about to get specific and talk numbers….

$5 trillion in various tax cuts
$2 trillion in military spending the Pentagon actually doesn’t want
$1 trillion in Bush tax cuts.

Big Bird lives!!! Obama just pointed out that the ONLY specifics Romney has given are “kill PBS funding and Planned Parenthood.” Which is like… less than $1 trillion by far.

Obama is really performing much better tonight, and he’s correct.

OMG. OMG. OMGOMGOMG. ROMNEY IS INTERRUPTING THE MODERATOR AGAIN *WHILE* SHE’S TRYING TO GIVE THE FLOOR TO HIM.

7:32PM: Y’know… for THE GOD OF BUSINESS…. it’s surprising he doesn’t know how businesses actually work. Giving a big tax break to businesses isn’t going to get them to hire unless there is demand. In a weak economy, where the engine (the lower and middle classes) is stalled, NOBODY WILL HIRE. Why on earth would anyone hire MORE people to handle the demand that’s already being met by fewer people?!

7:30PM: FACT. Unless you make 300k a year, you got a tax cut under Obama. You probably didn’t know it, but you did. See, Bams gave it to you in chunks, hidden in your paycheck, so you SPENT it (which grows the economy) instead of saving it. If he’d been trying to score some points, he could have just sent out a check for $300.00 with his name on it (like Dubya did) and you’d be kissing his butt all the way to the polls. Sheesh.

7:28PM: A recent study? Wonder if it was a BLOG ENTRY like that other “study” you cited.

Obama’s tax policy is pretty well known. He wants to make the Bush cuts for the middle classes permanent, allow the rates for the top bracket to go back up to Clinton – era levels (about 3%). This isn’t going to take a big chunk out of the deficit, but it is important (I think) that everyone has some skin in this game.

7:26PM: The nice lady would like to know which deductions you’re going to lie about tonight.

Romney “isn’t going to cut anything you care about.” lol

OH WOW. HE JUST CHANGED HIS TAX PLAN. wow. WOW.

FACT. Romney’s plan calls for a 20% cut to ALL tax brackets, and an additional lowering of the cap gains tax… TO ZERO. It’s a blatant give away to the wealthiest. BLATANT. God, this guy makes me want to vomit tonight.

60%?! They pay 45% now, doofus. And I’m FINE with that because the average holdings for the top .1% increased 329% during

the recession.

7:25PM: So. Romney is just going to ignore the moderator. Seriously. What a dickhead.

7:24PM: I’m just flabbergasted. Not only was Romney just LYING. He was totally out of line, talking to Obama like he was a kid or something. WTF.

7:23PM: Jesus Christ. Romney just fucking BLATANTLY LIED.

7:22PM: OMG!! Somebody is going to throw a punch, yo! Obama is explaining that if you want to drill on public lands, you use it or lose it!

The U.S. now imports 45% of its petroleum, down from 57% in 2008, and is on track to meet Obama’s long-term goal, the administration maintains.

Imports have fallen, in part, because the United States has increased domestic oil and gas production in recent years.

http://articles.latimes.com/2012/mar/12/news/la-pn-report-us-oil-imports-down-domestic-production-highest-since-2003-20120311

7:20PM: Whenever a Democrat defends coal… a kitten dies. COAL IS NOT CLEAN.

7:17PM: Obama just made a really good point… the reason we’ve had such a rocky start in green jobs is because China has such a

head start on us.

Oh, and Romney? THERE ARE MULTIPLE OIL CONTRACTS THAT OIL COMPANIES HAVEN’T EVEN BEGUN TO EXPLORE YET. Also? IT DOESN’T MATTER WHERE THE OIL COMES FROM, PEOPLE. It all goes into the global market, and does NOTHING to lower our gas prices. We produce like… 5.8 million barrels a day. Global consumption is over 80 million gallons a day. We are a drop in the bucket. The costs are high because of demand.

WAKE UP.

7:16PM: Interesting side note on the discussion of oil and energy… 2 million jobs in Romney’s 12 million jobs plan are from “energy” jobs…. which are a continuation of Obama’s current policies. Just saying.

7:15PM: Did… they just cut Romney’s mic?!

7:13PM: Obama is awake tonight people. It might just be ON.

7:10PM: Candy would like to know how this can be fixed right now.

Romney claims Obama sucks, and 12 MILLION NEW JOBS!!!! (a lie). Romney is now saying he never said we should let Detroit go bankrupt. And he’s claiming credit for the Auto bailout. Read it for yourself: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/19/opinion/19romney.html?_r=0

7:05PM: Jeremy wants to know what these chuckleheads can do to guarantee him a job after he graduates.

Romney is repeating the question in the form of a touching anecdote. Which really pisses me off, right out of the gate. ANSWER. THE. QUESTION. Doofus. What does a scholarship program you did in Mass. have to do with this?!

Now he’s gone off the track to tooting his job creation record, and not giving details. Jeremy looks dismayed.

Obama: College is good! Yay college! Obama hasn’t given any details either… but wait. Build manufacturing jobs. Yes, lovely, BUT HOW. I will say though. Obama has invested in Community Colleges… I should have started drinking earlier…..

Obama just made a great point about energy independence and green jobs. Interesting note, 3 million of Romney’s 12 million jobs in 4 years are actually jobs Obama’s policies are estimated to create over the next 4 years.

7:03PM: I’m glad Candy is explaining her job… since apparently there were some questions.

The time is soon. The drink is poured. The liver is frightened.

BRANG IT, MASTER DEBATERS.

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